According to the Bible, Jesus spat in a man’s eyes to cure him of blindness. It seems like an odd thing to do if Jesus was capable of healing the man without spitting in his eyes. Did Jesus enjoy spitting on people? Christians claim that the spit was symbolic, or that the whole event was acted out in order that its record would speak to people throughout the ages. Even though Jesus could have healed the man just by thinking it, he spat in his eyes anyway so that people would always remember how unfavorably we compare to Jesus and his Sky Daddy. I think that’s the same reason a school yard bully would spit in another kid’s eyes: to set himself above his victim. If there is a God, surely our relationship with him is abusive and we should try and get out. I can practically hear the Christians already exclaiming “What about the good times?” just like a battered wife. Similarly, we can’t help Christians out of their imaginary abusive relationship until they want our help.