PDA

View Full Version : Objective: Christian Ministries


Amigone201
08-20-2005, 12:19 PM
I thought you guys would all get a good howl at this. I found a website that's so nutty it creates a whole new class of fundie. These crazies make Falwell, Dobson, Wildmon, and their ilk look mainstream.

The site is called Objective: Christian Ministries. Their main site can be found here: http://objective.jesussave.us/index.html

If you can stomach it, poke around a little. I recommend the kids' area http://objective.jesussave.us/kidz.html and the Mall Mission http://objective.jesussave.us/mallmission.html as the most side-splitting (or repugnant, depending on your point of view).

Jennifer
08-20-2005, 12:51 PM
:D

I love this
# The Cross in Space - A mission to make sure the Cross is above every nation of the world by launching it into space in a Polar orbit.

# GetTheKidsOut.org - Alerting parents and pastors of the loss of faith and morals of children of Christian families who attend America's officially neutral "public schools".

# Rat Out A Church: Big Brother Church Watch - Liberal "churches" are using their tax-exempt status to promote Liberal politicians. Learn how to report their abuses to the IRS.

# Christian Exodus - Non-profit organization dedicated to creating a Christian homeland in North America via the secession of a US State from the Union.

# The Foundation For Moral Law - The official website and organization of former Alabama Chief Justice and Presidential Canidate Roy S. Moore.

# The Constitution Party - Join the Constitution Party in its work to restore our government to its Constitutional limits and our law to its Biblical foundation.

# American Family Association - America's largest pro-family action site.

# Marriage Protection Rally - Rally to keep the Secularists from outlawing Christian marriages.

# "In God We Trust" Poster Campaign - Put a poster with the official motto of our nation in every classroom.

# The Chalcedon Foundation - Exposing the bankruptcy of all non-Christian (and alleged but compromising Christian) systems of thought and practices and dedicated to providing the tools for rebuilding this Christian civilization with a devotion to maximum individual freedom under God's law.

# The Institute for Theonomic Reformation - The ITR is a Christ-centered, non-profit organization, which seeks to empower the Christian, and the church, so as to fulfill God's cultural commission of Christian responsibility: the restoration and application of Biblical Law and Biblical Ethics so as to faithfully encourage an explicitly Biblical Christian rule for both a national and global Theonomic culture.
I love number one, but what do you suppose the "Marraige Protection Rally" is about? Is one of you trying to stop Christians from getting married?

Evil_Mage_Ra
08-20-2005, 01:01 PM
What?!? This has to be a joke. It sounds like something you'd find on LandoverBaptist.

I can't tell what's nuttier--the Cross in Space program, the Rat Out a Church program (would the same also apply to backers of conservative politicians?), or the Christian Exodus program (they do know that's illegal, right?).

I think it'd be hilarious if the Christian Exodus somehow succeeded and Cross in Space program was put into effect, but something went horribly wrong and the cross fell out of orbit and flattened the Christian state. Muahahaha!

ghoulslime
08-20-2005, 01:13 PM
The kid's page is beyond crazy. Check Dr. Giraffenstein's dinosaur wisdom.

ghoulslime
08-20-2005, 01:17 PM
:D

I love number one, but what do you suppose the "Marraige Protection Rally" is about? Is one of you trying to stop Christians from getting married?
Sorry. That was me. :( I didn't expect them to start a marriage protection rally over it. :D

snap crafter
08-20-2005, 03:58 PM
I thought you guys would all get a good howl at this. I found a website that's so nutty it creates a whole new class of fundie. These crazies make Falwell, Dobson, Wildmon, and their ilk look mainstream.

The site is called Objective: Christian Ministries. Their main site can be found here: http://objective.jesussave.us/index.html

If you can stomach it, poke around a little. I recommend the kids' area http://objective.jesussave.us/kidz.html and the Mall Mission http://objective.jesussave.us/mallmission.html as the most side-splitting (or repugnant, depending on your point of view).
Is it me, or are those links giving ecommerce and sex ads?

Jennifer
08-20-2005, 04:09 PM
Snap, I thought you were kidding, but you're right. The zounds Christian rock takes you to porn. LOL Do you think they were hacked?

Jennifer
08-20-2005, 04:11 PM
Sorry. That was me. :( I didn't expect them to start a marriage protection rally over it. :D
Ghoul, stopping them from Breeding is futile. Instead we should capture some, tag them and re-release them into the wild for study.

Evil_Mage_Ra
08-20-2005, 04:13 PM
Snap, I thought you were kidding, but you're right. The zounds Christian rock takes you to porn. LOL Do you think they were hacked?
Hmmm......Did you get that information in your first post on this thread from their site? Did it look like a normal (well, relatively normal) Christian site at first?

Jennifer
08-20-2005, 04:18 PM
Yes, Evil, it looked real, but I just checked the email address in the mailto and it is the same address as the one listed on Landover. We've been had! That was good!

Jennifer
08-20-2005, 04:19 PM
I still love #1. Maybe we should do that with our screaming blue ant symbol.

Amigone201
08-20-2005, 04:20 PM
Damn, I really wanted it to be true. They got me with this one!

Jennifer
08-20-2005, 04:22 PM
Damn, I really wanted it to be true. They got me with this one!
Me too, that was the best 'gotcha' ever. Especially the little maze in the kids section....and the Professor.

snap crafter
08-20-2005, 04:26 PM
Now I feel I've missed something :(