Stoned Tablets from the Mount

[Philboid Studge]

So much energy has been devoted by cumchuggers since antiquity to the proposition that the Ten Commandments are all that. 'Timeless,' I'm told they are. I say the Ten C-words are mostly frigging useless. Attend:

One: 'You shall have no other gods before Me.'

This is useful how, exactly? Maybe to keep sheeple toeing the frigging Hebrew line.

Two: 'You shall not make for yourself a carved image--any likeness of anything that is in heaven above, or that is in the earth beneath, or that is in the water under the earth.'

There may be some utility here, but it's gonna piss off stonemasons. Also: fuck art!

Three: 'You shall not take the name of the LORD your God in vain.'

How in the name of Jesus Taint-Sniffing Christ is that useful ?

Four: 'Remember the Sabbath day, to keep it holy.'

Got it! I'll keep it holy by a) doing no work (the frigging opposite of useful) and
b) watching football to get the sour taste of Jewsus off my palate.

Five: 'Honor your father and your mother.'

Do you really need to be told this? And if your parents happen to be douche-bags, the truly useful thing to do would be to get the fuck out and hope they don't reproduce further.

Six: 'You shall not murder.'

Good advice! And what is murder? It's an illegal killing. 'Nuther words, this law states that you should follow the law. That's about as useful as topping off a plate of chicken marsala with a gentle laxative.

Seven: 'You shall not commit adultery.'

Shan't I? But if no one got married, there can be no adultery. Sweet!

Eight: 'You shall not steal.'

I'll admit it's a useful guideline, but was Moses' posse really such a bunch of assholes that they needed to be told this?

Nine: 'You shall not bear false witness against your neighbor.'

This one, along with #8 and #6, are the only ones that are codified in contemporary
laws (in Merkinland, anyway). Timeless my ass! Maybe they should be The Three Commandments; be easier to remember.

Ten: 'You shall not covet your neighbor's house; you shall not covet your neighbor's wife, nor his male servant, nor his female servant, nor his ox, nor his ass, nor anything that is your neighbor's.'

However ... if my neighbor's female servant's ass does not technically belong to said neighbor, then coveting and tapping it are cool, right? Okay, that one's useful.

I'll be damned if I turn down the chance to tap my neighbours female servants ass.

Of course the ten commandments were useful once. When they were actually carved in stone, you could hit people with them.

Phil, what, exactly, is wrong with sniffing a taint?

Have you read this: http://www.secweb.org/index.aspx?action=viewAsset&id=2 ?

Solon's 'commandments' are way better. In the future, any dipstick supporting Moses' crap laws gets the Solon edumacation.

[Eva]

yes, renman! let's solomize 'em!!!!

[Philboid Studge]

Rat Bastard wrote

Phil, what, exactly, is wrong with sniffing a taint?

Thou shalt not cover thy neighbor's taint!

Fair enough!

[calpurnpiso]

Eva wrote

yes, renman! let's solomize 'em!!!!

Solon was a pussy. He didn't have the balls Hammurabi ( ca 1700 bce) had. While there is no evidence Moses and his stupid tablets existed, there is evidence of a basalt Tablet inspired by god written by one of his 'sons".!

It is amazing retarded Christ-psychotics worship a delusion, immersing their dysfunctional dopamine addicted brains on the fairy tales of the Babble, while been BLIND to the fact that there is actually a TABLE of LAWS written by "god" that they can touch and SEE. Since REALITY doesn't concern those retarded fools, a compendium of anachronistic idiocies is best suited to their defective retarded brains than a tangible truth.

Instead of believing in those things that do not exist like Jesus, angels, demons, Moses, Abraham, and rest of mythological characters, the retards ought to LAND go to the Louvre in Paris and SEE the REAL word of god on the black basalt stela of Hammurabi. It is REAL! But reality doesn't produced the needed dopamine as Fairy tales do. Isn't amazing? there are hundreds of Word of God stelas all over the world. WHERE is the one of Moses? Since the other ones are REAL, Christ-psychotics IGNORE them..and reality doesn't produced dopamine like deluded fantasies do.





If the Christ-psychotics need to SEE a TRUE ANGEL, well, they can see one at the Louvre. Right on the grand staircase. How many of these retards visit the Louvre ignoring the FACT there is an ANGEL on a staircase? I am certain children would NOTICE while the retarded Christian parents will continue giving their children LIES infecting their minds.

The Victory at Samothrace. Victory was personified as a WINGED LADY ( Nike) as LOVE is personified by a winged boy with arrows. A helper of the Messenger Hermes ( Mercury). Wings are symbolic of SPIRIT/SOUL. as a CROSS is symbolic of the RAYS of the sun-god.

[Choobus]

if it weren't for the ten commandments we would never have had that asshole on Colbert who was demanding that some Judge who had put them on a rock in th e lobby of his courthouse be allowed to keep it there, and who could not name them when asked.

[Philboid Studge]

Choobus wrote

if it weren't for the ten commandments we would never have had that asshole on Colbert who was demanding that some Judge who had put them on a rock in th e lobby of his courthouse be allowed to keep it there, and who could not name them when asked.

I trust it was noted that an engraved rock violates commandment #2?




*I said 'number two.'*

[Choobus]

does it? It was just the commandments. If that violates number 2 (he he he) then didn't God give moses the shaft by making him carved tablets?

[Sternwallow]

mmfwmc wrote

I'll be damned if I turn down the chance to tap my neighbours female servants ass.

Of course the ten commandments were useful once. When they were actually carved in stone, you could hit people with them.

[Gnosital]

Choobus wrote

does it? It was just the commandments. If that violates number 2 (he he he) then didn't God give moses the shaft by making him carved tablets?

Doesn't jeebus' asshole dad give people the shaft all the time?

Sans lube?

Just positin'

[Choobus]

Gnosital wrote

Doesn't jeebus' asshole dad give people the shaft all the time?

Sans lube?

Just positin'

in the original bible God turns Lot's wife not into a pillar of salt but into a giant dildo, then he fucks lot int he ass with it. I don't know why they changed it.