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Old 08-07-2014, 12:52 PM   #1
atheistnerd64
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If you had a Bible in your hands right now what would you do with it?

I'd most likely take a shit on it.
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Old 08-07-2014, 02:46 PM   #2
Michael
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I'd probably put it down somewhere because I'm doing other things right now.

Besides, shitting on it would just be messy. Especially if I was holding it in my hands at the time. Then afterwards you've got to clean all that shit up, which is just going yo ruin my mop. The whole thing just seems impractical.

Michael...you are correct
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Old 08-07-2014, 03:48 PM   #3
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Stop the Holy See men!
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Old 08-08-2014, 02:11 AM   #4
dogpet
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Remember when Hank Moody was in rehab, sans skins & tore a page out to roll a joint. I think he chose something from the old testament?

thank goodness he's on our side
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Old 08-08-2014, 04:01 AM   #5
ILOVEJESUS
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I would take it out into the streets and read from it aloft a crate. My hair blowing biblically in the breeze as I pour those words of glory from my lips.

A theist is just an atheist with a space in it.
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Old 08-08-2014, 11:41 AM   #6
Sinfidel
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Yes, yes, yes! I want a double buttwipe dispenser - one with the Bible, the other with the Koran.

Use foolproof airtight logic on a mind that's closed and you're dead. - William J. Reilly, Opening Closed Minds
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Old 08-08-2014, 05:51 PM   #7
Smellyoldgit
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Stop the Holy See men!
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Old 08-09-2014, 03:01 PM   #8
ghoulslime
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For many years, I used to make it a habit to blow a booger or spit into any Bible or Koran that I happened to find in my hotel room. (I've usually given the Buddhist or Hindu books a free pass, owing to their lack of evil content - aside from nonsensical gobbledygook.) I've since found that Bibles and Korans in hotel rooms can actually be very useful for blowing one's nose, disposing of chewed gum, even for wiping cum after one has been jacking off to farm animal pornography. All malicious intent aside, these are handy tools to have in a hotel room for a quick clean up!

The Leprechauns do not forbid the drawing of Their images, as long as we color within the lines. ~ Ghoulslime H Christ, Prophet, Seer, Revelator, and Masturbator
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Old 08-10-2014, 09:39 AM   #9
Kinich Ahau
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Spot on! Even the gobbledeBook says your stuff must not hit the ground. The hotel ceiling is OK though, I think.

Once you are dead, you are nothing. Graffito, Pompeii
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Old 08-10-2014, 12:28 PM   #10
Smellyoldgit
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So that's what the catlickers get up to in them there semenaries!

Stop the Holy See men!
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Old 08-13-2014, 12:38 PM   #11
Lahjick
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Quote:
ghoulslime wrote View Post
For many years, I used to make it a habit to blow a booger or spit into any Bible or Koran that I happened to find in my hotel room. (I've usually given the Buddhist or Hindu books a free pass, owing to their lack of evil content - aside from nonsensical gobbledygook.) I've since found that Bibles and Korans in hotel rooms can actually be very useful for blowing one's nose, disposing of chewed gum, even for wiping cum after one has been jacking off to farm animal pornography. All malicious intent aside, these are handy tools to have in a hotel room for a quick clean up!
LMAO
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Old 09-09-2014, 06:35 PM   #12
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I would give it to my children and tell them to read it. Afterwards I would dry their tears and comfort them.

I will grieve. Grief is not a theistic concept. ~ Sternwallow
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