Old 02-28-2015, 04:36 AM   #1
Sinfidel
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Let's Outlaw Sex


Use foolproof airtight logic on a mind that's closed and you're dead. - William J. Reilly, Opening Closed Minds
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Old 02-28-2015, 04:37 AM   #2
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Here in the Colony of Canader, our Ontario Fiberal guvmint has updated the sex ed curriculum, which has roused the rabid religious morons to protest. "Parents should decide how ignorant their kids should be kept".
"Teach math not masturbation" read the protest signs. Yes, horror of horrors, the Education folks are going to teach 11 and 12 year olds about masturbation, thus undoing parental efforts such as cutting the end off their kids dicks, and feeding them corn flakes and graham crackers.
I don't know about you, but when mother nature gifted me with puberty, humping the mattress was a hell of a lot more fun than math. And I wasn't taught it in sex ed - there wasn't any then.
Prior to that, the announcement of bedtime resulted in whiney protests, but once puberty hit, the chance to get under the covers and do the nasty deed couldn't come soon enough.
What is it with these religious nutbars that enrages them at the mere thought of anyone else enjoying sex and making it their life mission to prevent it. They are too stupid to realize that, sex ed or not, their kids are going to discover masturbation, unless they castrate or neuter them prior to puberty. The Catlick church did that so the boy's choir could keep their soprano voices, so why not to prevent those ugly mattress stains?
As usual, the protests make little sense, since parents have the right to have their children removed from such classes. Same folks who no doubt tell their kids the earth is flat and eviloution is a lie.
There should be special schools for such children, where the only textbook is the bible. Think of the taxpayer savings! Oh wait, don't they have that in Texas already?
Knowing how government works, before applauding this move, is there the usual real motive, such as friends in the textbook business?
It's all so laughable. In the age of the Internet, is there a six year old who hasn't discovered that ultimate sex ed known as porn?

Use foolproof airtight logic on a mind that's closed and you're dead. - William J. Reilly, Opening Closed Minds
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Old 02-28-2015, 06:41 AM   #3
Smellyoldgit
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Outlaw sex? - fuck that.

Stop the Holy See men!
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Old 02-28-2015, 08:42 AM   #4
dstallma
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I am sure that will work the same as outlawing recreational drugs.

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Old 02-28-2015, 09:30 AM   #5
Smellyoldgit
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Imagine the prison population swollen with a flood of incarcerated wankers!

Stop the Holy See men!
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Old 02-28-2015, 11:11 AM   #6
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Imagine the prison population swollen with a flood of incarcerated wankers!
I'd say it probably is already - after all, if you're incarcerated, wanking is pretty much the only entertainment....

Use foolproof airtight logic on a mind that's closed and you're dead. - William J. Reilly, Opening Closed Minds
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Old 02-28-2015, 11:47 AM   #7
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Canada has its own right wingnut pundit, like Rush Limbaugh, whose rants are regularly fed to the masses via several major Dailys, of which only the right wing variety are left, er, should I have said still exist.
Michael Coren fancies himself a famous author, having written several not very original works aimed to appeal to a Catholic readership, thus ensuring book sales and support.
Michael has also enjoyed parading his homophobia, justifying it by pointing out such is part of Catholic teaching. As far as sinfulness goes, the masturbators are on equal footing with the homos, in the Catholic view. But, don't take my word for it, you can look it up in the Online Catholic Encyclopedia.
Yet, Michael's belief in Catholic dogma has never, to my knowledge, caused him to denounce masturbators!
Can we be sure that neither Michael nor his children have ever committed the grave sin of choking the chicken?
Recently, Michael wrote that he has had a bit of a rethink on the homo issue, although stopping short of actually apologizing, and reiterating his Catholic beliefs. What is surprising is that Michael is bi, no, not bisexual (that we know of), but bi-faithful. He claims to be both Jewish and Catholic.
One is rather suspicious of his new found acceptance of the gay crowd, and wonder if there is any connection to his loss of employment with the demise of Sun TV. Time to appeal to a different audience Michael?

Use foolproof airtight logic on a mind that's closed and you're dead. - William J. Reilly, Opening Closed Minds
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Old 02-28-2015, 05:20 PM   #8
Kinich Ahau
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The average teen boy wanks six time a day emitting so many millions of sperm. Multiply that by 364 days a year. I could go on and on. You have likely got the point by now though. Masturbation is maths.

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Old 03-01-2015, 01:46 AM   #9
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Outlaw sex for teens? Brilliant. Everyone knows that as soon as you tell teens they're too young for something and it's only for adults, they instantly lose interest in doing said thing.

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Old 03-01-2015, 08:23 AM   #10
ghoulslime
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Doncha know nuthin? Our imaginary friend is going to reward us for resisting our own biology! All you have to do is eat his flesh and drink his blood, and BAM, you get to live forever! It all makes such perfect sense! Now stop stimulating your genitals!

The Leprechauns do not forbid the drawing of Their images, as long as we color within the lines. ~ Ghoulslime H Christ, Prophet, Seer, Revelator, and Masturbator
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Old 03-02-2015, 06:49 AM   #11
Davin
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I learned how to masturbate on my own, it's not that difficult, though I didn't know it was called masturbation. I was taught that masturbation was a sin, but not what it was. It actually might have helped prevent me from doing it for a little bit longer if they both taught that it was a sin and what it was... then I might have held off until I was 12, maybe even 13.

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Old 03-02-2015, 08:25 AM   #12
Sinfidel
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Outlaw sex for teens? Brilliant. Everyone knows that as soon as you tell teens they're too young for something and it's only for adults, they instantly lose interest in doing said thing.
Exactly! Doesn't just apply to teens, though. Look at how prohibition killed off the brewery and distillery industries!

Use foolproof airtight logic on a mind that's closed and you're dead. - William J. Reilly, Opening Closed Minds
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Old 07-10-2016, 12:44 AM   #13
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Outlawing desire is the first law of fascism.
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