Compromise or Compromising?

Professor Chaos · 09-12-2009, 03:52 PM

I may have mentioned before that my wife subscribes to this weird hybrid of weak deism, agnosticism, and Christianity. She, like many Americans, picks and chooses her beliefs based on what makes her feel good. As you can imagine, with her father dying recently, she's taking comfort in "knowing" that he exists somewhere in some afterlife. Also, she, like many Americans, values going to church for the "sense of community."

Anyways, we rarely argue about my edict that the kids (daughter age 3, son age 2) do not attend church. I will not have my children brainwashed, and she's ok with that. I let her have them baptized, since that really doesn't do any harm and it made her (and her mother) feel good.

Recently - perhaps because of my father-in-law's death - I've been thinking about a compromise. I've been thinking about joining the family in a Unitarian church. I know jack shit about Unitarianism, other than it's essentially non-religious and many non-believers belong to Unitarian churches.

What do you lot know about Unitarianism? I can (and will) research it as much as I can, but could this be a decent way to give my wife that weekly sense of belonging to a community and assistance in teaching my children morals and values without compromising their intellectual growth? Or is Unitarianism just a polished turd?

Choobus · 09-12-2009, 04:23 PM

There's a simple test you can perform: does this group believe in things without any evidence and/or make claims about reality that they cannot in any way justify? If the answer is yes, they are no different from catlickers, jizzlamicists, scienturdologists and so on. Seeming like a good idea to people who are going through a difficult time is exactly how these spunkwizards operate. Go if you think it will help, but don't kid yourself that it's any different from all the other christpunchers, allasmackers or godidiots in general. The ones that seem reasonable are the most insidious of all; at least with the fundies you know immediately that what they believe is toilet fodder.

Eva · 09-12-2009, 07:10 PM

i say babysit the kids while she is at church, offer to do the dishes a couple of times per week, and stay home with the kids. have something awesome cooked for when she comes back.
or join a service-oriented club that is non-religious.

ubs · 09-12-2009, 07:39 PM

It depends on the group.

I grew up attending Unitarian Church. It was very hippy dippy. Lots of atheists and gays. Sermons were poetry readings, usually without a mention of any diety. They also took us on field trips to other places of worship, which did more for atheism than any comparative religion class...and they took us skiing. The teen sex ed class they taught was considerably more informative than health class. It was positive experience and I'm glad we went.

But the one near me now takes the Uni part of Unitarian very seriously. No atheists in site, which is why I go to the zen center instead.

I think Sunday morning family socializing is great, but I would shop the place without the kids before I committed them. Especially little ones that can't really articulate that Sunday School is run by a wacko.

Sternwallow · 09-13-2009, 04:47 AM

Unitarian or whatever, I would locate and skim their sacred text and other defining documents first. If they have a fundamentalist branch and if that has a zealot/crazy wing, it will likely cling to those texts for justification.

dogpet · 09-13-2009, 07:14 AM

A caution would be, that you & your family could be used in church going statistics, thereby contributing to argumentum ad populum douchewizardry.

Philboid Studge · 09-13-2009, 07:51 AM

Bart: What religion are you?

Homer: You know, the one with all the well-meaning rules that don't work out in real life. Uh… Christianity.

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If you feel you must pick a church, go Universal Life ("Philboid Studge" is an ordained minister). They seemed to have filed away enough bullshit to make their 'religion' indistinguishable from say, a community arts center.

Quote:

The Universal Life Church has no traditional doctrine. We as an organization believe in that which is right. Each individual has the privilege and responsibility to determine what is right for themselves, as long as it does not infringe on the rights of others. We do not stand between you and your God. We are active advocates of the First Amendment of the Constitution of the United States of America.

Eva · 09-13-2009, 12:07 PM

universal life sounds so much like an insurance company...

ghoulslime · 09-13-2009, 12:24 PM

I say fuck the church shit. It's a goddamn waste of time. Take them to Universal Studios instead, or really just fuck it all and run 'em down to Tijuana and throw down a couple of beers at Adelitas.

Smellyoldgit · 09-13-2009, 12:33 PM

Quote:

ghoulslime wrote

I say fuck the church shit.

I must heartily concur.
Mr Unitarian has just polished his turd to a slightly more shiny state than the mainstrean turd polishers who use a rougher buffing cloth.
Once you give in to the chuggers - I'm afraid only greater chugging will follow.

Eva · 09-13-2009, 12:37 PM

prof, you should have made a poll about this.

Smellyoldgit · 09-13-2009, 12:41 PM

I'll wager he's considered that - - - - but knows how unpalatable the result will be when thrown up.

dogpet · 09-13-2009, 01:12 PM

Quote:

Eva wrote

universal life sounds so much like an insurance company...

We could get Philboid excommunicated if we grass him for using a spirit name in his application

ghoulslime · 09-13-2009, 04:29 PM

Quote:

dogpet wrote

We could get Philboid excommunicated if we grass him for using a spirit name in his application

We totally gotta get him excommunicated! Imagine the national scandal of yet another clergymen of the Universal Life Church exposing himself to the altar of truth!

ghoulslime · 09-13-2009, 04:33 PM

Quote:

Philboid Studge wrote

Bart: What religion are you?

Homer: You know, the one with all the well-meaning rules that don't work out in real life. Uh… Christianity.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

If you feel you must pick a church, go Universal Life ("Philboid Studge" is an ordained minister). They seemed to have filed away enough bullshit to make their 'religion' indistinguishable from say, a community arts center.

Actually, I'm kinda envious of this. What do I need to do to get ordained? I can totally see it now...Reverend Ghoulslime! Reverend! People would be all like, "Ghoulslime, so I understand you don't believe that Jesus lives inside of goldfish shaped crackers!" And I would be all like, "That's Reverend Ghoulslime to you! I didn't spend $25 and 15 minutes filling out an online application for the Universal Life Church to be called 'Ghoulslime'!"

Reverend Ghoulslime! It sort of makes you want to treat me with more respect.

Do you think they would ordain Ghoulslime H Christ without a formal church hearing?