Old 03-29-2019, 03:03 AM   #31
hertz vanrental
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I have never felt"the guilt", though I wish I could not feel "the guilt" more often than I do these days.
Yes. Fine. But what our audience wants to know is - have you ever shat/shit/shitted/shatted yourself in a plane?

Do I sound like a fuckin' people person?
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Old 03-29-2019, 12:44 PM   #32
Shizacop
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It's an involuntary reaction, stupid, but then your religion infected brain probably can't handle a bit of critical thinking.
Huh? You obviously can't read - the passengers are terrified as they see their death is imminent - that is the etnernal "hell" I'm talking about, not the shit per sae - although they will feel cold smelly feeling in their pants as their fear and distress (which they will be trapped with in their dying thought) becomes forever frozen in time.

BTW - How is my brain religious effected, ? My post is obviously anti-religion - did you have a stroke or something recently?
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Old 03-29-2019, 12:50 PM   #33
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Whoa there Musky. Before you ask about jebus time lines, isn't it a logical requirement to first prove that jebus actually existed? This is a typical christard ploy.

Do you have such proof?
If you go too far "atheist" in your positions,, such as to be a heretic against what is almost unanimously agreed to among historians (including atheist and agnostic historians) - you loose your credibility my friend.

Jesus almost for certain existed. He was a religious minded statesman - who gained some political power - and was crucified.

If you want a good perspective on historical truth, I recommend reading Bart Erhman's works.

Satan Bless!
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Old 03-29-2019, 01:53 PM   #34
hertz vanrental
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If you go too far "atheist" in your positions,, such as to be a heretic against what is almost unanimously agreed to among historians (including atheist and agnostic historians) - you loose your credibility my friend.

Jesus almost for certain existed. He was a religious minded statesman - who gained some political power - and was crucified.

If you want a good perspective on historical truth, I recommend reading Bart Erhman's works.

Satan Bless!
Try reading Carrier et al. You will then see that there is absolutely no evidence that zombie boy jebus ever existed.

Also, try using some common sense. OK. So some twat wanders through Galilee and Jerusalem and starts turning water into wine. Do you realise how important wine was to the Romans? Do you realise how commercially valuable this ability would be? If this really happened, do you really believe that the Romans would simple let the twat continue to roam free, especially as he, apparently, also had the ability to cure all manner of medical issues simply by touching the person? Most likely, if this were the case, jebus would have been whisked off to Rome to laze out his days at the pleasure of the Emperor. He wasn't. Why?

Also, the Romans were one of the most anally-retentive civilisations ever to walk the planet. They documented anything and everything including household accounts and recipes. Do you think for one minute that zombie boy jebus had a D-Notice slapped on him by his dad? If zombie boy really did exist, there would have been a mountain written about him during his lifetime and we would have found it. Yet, the Romans wrote NOTHING about zombie boy during his supposed lifetime. Now why do you suppose that is?

Why is it that we believe zombie boy existed? Because, in the past, if we didn't, the fuckin' church would have us put to death.

So, before you come out with your bleedin' zombie bot existence shit, do your fuckin' homework and switch your brain on.

Do I sound like a fuckin' people person?
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Old 03-30-2019, 01:42 AM   #35
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Hertz, I haven't shat myself in a plane yet but it's on my shit-bucket list maybe sometime soon.

There is a possibility that Jesus existed but he likely bears little resemblance to the one told in the bullshit stories, this includes life, birth, death, movements, quotes, timeline etc. almost everything is questionable. The story is told so as to fulfil jewish prophesies and meet the well established archetypes for immortal religious figures. For this reason when arguing with theists my default position is that the Jesus they are talking about certainly did not exist.

Once you are dead, you are nothing. Graffito, Pompeii
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Old 03-30-2019, 02:28 AM   #36
hertz vanrental
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Hertz, I haven't shat myself in a plane yet but it's on my shit-bucket list maybe sometime soon.

There is a possibility that Jesus existed but he likely bears little resemblance to the one told in the bullshit stories, this includes life, birth, death, movements, quotes, timeline etc. almost everything is questionable. The story is told so as to fulfil jewish prophesies and meet the well established archetypes for immortal religious figures. For this reason when arguing with theists my default position is that the Jesus they are talking about certainly did not exist.
KA

I wish you well in shitting yourself aboard an aircraft. I haven't yet managed that task but hope to, as long as it's well into my dotage.

From what I know of the time that zombie boy supposedly roamed the planet, every second Jewish male was called jebus. So exactly which jebus does the babble speak of? Maybe the babble talks about a melange of real and fictitious jebuses/jebii/jebus?

One thing is for sure. Jo and the young tart Mary most certainly did not get on a donkey in Nazareth and piss off to Bethlehem 'to be counted' somewhere around 0 AD. Firstly, Nazareth wasn't occupied in the 1st century AD and, secondly, people are counted in the area where they live, for obvious reasons. They are never counted in the town of the birth of the head of the family. How dumb do christards think people are?

Do I sound like a fuckin' people person?
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Old 03-30-2019, 08:38 AM   #37
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Hertz, I haven't shat myself in a plane yet but it's on my shit-bucket list maybe sometime soon.

There is a possibility that Jesus existed but he likely bears little resemblance to the one told in the bullshit stories, this includes life, birth, death, movements, quotes, timeline etc. almost everything is questionable. The story is told so as to fulfil jewish prophesies and meet the well established archetypes for immortal religious figures. For this reason when arguing with theists my default position is that the Jesus they are talking about certainly did not exist.
I agree. You are being polite to Hertzvanrental by saying "there is a {mere} possibility". There is a very high probability that Jesus existed.
Vanrental's against Jesus existence rant merely causes him to loose his credibility as a reasonable spokesperson for atheism.
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Old 03-30-2019, 08:43 AM   #38
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I agree that we should all be highly suspicious of all things written about Jesus. However, I do think it much more likely than not that there was a single individual who rose to an uncomfortable level of power - promoting Messiah- ship (as many did at the time), his name was Jesus of Nazareth, and he was indeed crucified, died and placed in a tomb.
Few historians disagree with that.
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Old 03-30-2019, 08:48 AM   #39
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.

Also, try using some common sense. OK. So some twat wanders through Galilee and Jerusalem and starts turning water into wine. Do you realise how important wine was to the Romans? Do you realise how commercially valuable this ability would be? If this really happened, do you really believe that the Romans would simple let the twat continue to roam free, especially as he, apparently, also had the ability to cure all manner of medical issues simply by touching the person? Most likely, if this were the case, jebus would have been whisked off to Rome to laze out his days at the pleasure of the Emperor. He wasn't. Why?

So, before you come out with your bleedin' zombie bot existence shit, do your fuckin' homework and switch your brain on.
Its equally possible that the Romans saw Jesus as a political threat, hence they did not want to affiliate themselves with him - and instead persecuted him. And this is supported in the historical record. The emperor of Rome I'm sure would have had enough wine without Jesus LOL .

I suppose they could have captured Jesus and made him into a slave at there medical clinics (one point for Vanrental). Maybe this would have happened if Ceasar got sick. Can you provide more info on this idea?
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Old 03-30-2019, 11:35 AM   #40
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I wish you well in shitting yourself aboard an aircraft. I haven't yet managed that task but hope to, as long as it's well into my dotage.

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You wanna know what the 9th Circle of Hell is? You wanna know what eternal damnation in the deepest darkest depths of perdition is?

Its being one of 26 passengers with a violent case of the shits on a 13 hour plane ride. That is absolutely the worst thing I can ever possibly imagine. Now granted this is a diesel plane with 10 bathrooms, but nonetheless. Being quarantined to the back of a flight with a bunch of South Americans shitting their pants 30,000 feet in the air for half a day are some of the worst human conditions I can possible imagine. Fucking musical chairs with the shitters on the plane pooping right on top of other peoples poop and vomit. I’d say by the 3rd hour, my 9th or 10th shit, I’d be praying for that plane to crash. There could be women and children on that plane. It could be a 747 filled with newborn infants and puppies and I’d rather plummet into the side of a mountain than endure 10 more hours of shitting my brains out with a bunch of Chilean diarrhea victims.
https://www.barstoolsports.com/post/...a-to-australia

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Old 03-30-2019, 12:04 PM   #41
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Shitsacop wrote:

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Huh? You obviously can't read - the passengers are terrified as they see their death is imminent - that is the etnernal "hell" I'm talking about, not the shit per sae - although they will feel cold smelly feeling in their pants
Ever seen a horse or cow defecate in cold weather...where do you think the " steaming pile of...." came from? Having spent several months wearing diapers after hospital emergency cured my walking problem by giving me a fractured hip, I can assure you crapping yourself ain't cold, until the staff keeps you waiting an hour for cleanup. Of course, your case may be different, since most religious are so cold hearted their turds probably come out frozen.

Use foolproof airtight logic on a mind that's closed and you're dead. - William J. Reilly, Opening Closed Minds

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Old 03-30-2019, 12:08 PM   #42
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Hertz, I haven't shat myself in a plane yet but it's on my shit-bucket list maybe sometime soon.
.

Did you succeed?


Quote:
A British Airways flight was forced to turn around and land over the weekend because somebody did a shit so bad the plane was essentially rendered useless.

https://www.vice.com/en_ca/article/g...d-and-land-475



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Old 03-30-2019, 12:19 PM   #43
Sinfidel
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Try reading Carrier et al. You will then see that there is absolutely no evidence that zombie boy jebus ever existed.

Whilst out shopping yesterday, drove past a local church whose large sign featured "Jesus is coming soon!" Not sure if that referred to Jesus masturbating or an impending visit. The Christers have been proclaiming this for 2,000 years now, which renders their claims of prophecy mere bullshit. The "scriptures" promise his return within his own generation! Since Jesus IS god, obviously God is a liar.

Use foolproof airtight logic on a mind that's closed and you're dead. - William J. Reilly, Opening Closed Minds
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Old 03-30-2019, 12:25 PM   #44
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Hertz, I haven't shat myself in a plane yet but it's on my shit-bucket list maybe sometime soon.

Just in case, wear brown pants!



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Old 03-30-2019, 12:34 PM   #45
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THE PENTAGON — In response to the unexpected soiling of a lieutenant’s underwear, every member of the U.S. armed forces will now be required to wear diapers, Duffel Blog has learned.

The policy is to be implemented “as soon as humanly possible,” according to an unsigned memorandum distributed via email.

Army Lt. Kyle Nathery was apparently in the middle of a pull-up when he first understood that something was terribly amiss. Though he tried a maneuver he described as a “clench-and-retract,” it was soon evident that he had reached the point of no return, sources said.

Observers of the incident say they wanted to help, but couldn’t think of a way to do so without it being gross.

“I noticed he was walking funny,” said Pfc. Sandra Colt, a member of his platoon. “Kind of like he was trying to hold a pencil in between his ass cheeks — not that I know what that looks like or would ever do such a thing. But then he stopped really suddenly and made this small noise, like the tiniest cry for help I’d ever heard. My heart broke for the guy. I knew right away what had happened.”

“The bottom line — no pun intended — is that this occurrence is a stain — again, no pun intended — on the reputation of our nation’s military,” said Gen. Joseph Dunford, chairman of the Joint Chiefs. “It is vitally important that we take this one isolated incident and broadly apply it to everyone who wears a uniform.”
https://www.duffelblog.com/2017/09/e...-wear-diapers/

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