Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 08-16-2005, 06:45 PM   #16
ghoulslime
I Live Here
 
ghoulslime's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Los Angeles, CA
Posts: 20,923
Quote:
Tib wrote
if masturbation is wrong I dont wanta be right??
Just use your left hand. :D

The Leprechauns do not forbid the drawing of Their images, as long as we color within the lines. ~ Ghoulslime H Christ, Prophet, Seer, Revelator, and Masturbator
ghoulslime is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-17-2005, 05:29 PM   #17
Choobus
I Live Here
 
Choobus's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: prick up your ears
Posts: 20,553
My mate Tommy Pedro (an atheist) claims to have wanked off 17 times in one day. I believe him. Can any theists beat this? (so to speak)

You can always turn tricks for a few extra bucks. If looks are an issue, there's the glory hole option, but don't expect more than ... tips.
~ Philiboid Studge
Choobus is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-18-2005, 10:33 AM   #18
Striver
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Quote:
Choobus wrote
My mate Tommy Pedro (an atheist) claims to have wanked off 17 times in one day. I believe him. Can any theists beat this? (so to speak)
I don't believe this. There's no way he'd be getting any pleasure from it after the first 2 or 3 times or so
  Reply With Quote
Old 08-18-2005, 03:22 PM   #19
Aristarchus
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Quote:
Striver wrote
Quote:
Choobus wrote
My mate Tommy Pedro (an atheist) claims to have wanked off 17 times in one day. I believe him. Can any theists beat this? (so to speak)
I don't believe this. There's no way he'd be getting any pleasure from it after the first 2 or 3 times or so
What? With the right diet and technique you can have a ready-rupert, inside and out, after about 17 minutes from the previous wank. I say I could milk the snake 50 to 55 times in one day if I wanted to. That's called a healthy libido, folks. :D



I could impregnate the world in under a week. Not to brag or anything. :cool:


Edit: And it would be pleasurable up to 43rd time for a 1-day wankathon, and pleasurable up to the Philippines for a world-impregnation attempt.
  Reply With Quote
Old 08-18-2005, 03:31 PM   #20
Tenspace
I Live Here
 
Tenspace's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Rocky Mountains, USA
Posts: 10,218
Quote:
Aristarchus wrote
Edit: And it would be pleasurable up to 43rd time for a 1-day wankathon, and pleasurable up to the Philippines for a world-impregnation attempt.
Would the Phillipines fall before or after Thailand on your route? ;)

"Science and Mother Nature are in a marriage where Science is always surprised to come home and find Mother Nature blowing the neighbor." - Justin's Dad
Tenspace is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-22-2005, 05:42 PM   #21
Another brick in the wall
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Per day or lifetime total? I'd have to use scientific notation to express my tally. I was very lonely during junior high school.
  Reply With Quote
Old 08-22-2005, 06:40 PM   #22
Sir Sin-O-Lot
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Quote:
ghoulslime wrote
Quote:
Tib wrote
if masturbation is wrong I dont wanta be right??
Just use your left hand. :D
It's only a sin if it's done correctly. ;)
  Reply With Quote
Old 08-24-2005, 10:12 PM   #23
Choobus
I Live Here
 
Choobus's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: prick up your ears
Posts: 20,553
nobody can challenge Tommy Pedro! His 17 wank/day record stands. All hail chief wanker tommy pedro, the king of jerking, the master of mastabation, the iyatollah of spunk

You can always turn tricks for a few extra bucks. If looks are an issue, there's the glory hole option, but don't expect more than ... tips.
~ Philiboid Studge
Choobus is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-24-2005, 10:31 PM   #24
Fryan
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Quote:
St. Teabag wrote
Since we are informed that there are no Raelian orgies, I submit that they are the ones who wank themost. Certainly from testmanias posts he has revealed himself to be a right tosser, and the jerky nature if his writing is quite consistend with a one handed tyoing style. I say without evidence and in an entirely arbitrary manner that testmanina wanks his tiny penis more than this tommy pedro character, probably over 20 times a day. He may well do so to please his alien masters
The harvesting of the man-chowder of a true believer Raelian is probably part of the Raelian cloning procedure;)
  Reply With Quote
Old 08-25-2005, 09:32 AM   #25
ChiefOfAss
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Quote:
Bighead wrote
I'm at LEAST once a day, usually twice, sometimes thrice. When I was still a xtian, it was maybe once a week...I thought that what I was doing was wrong and that god was going to hate me...then I learned to say fuck god and now I'm a happy 2x a day wanker.
Wasn't it better when you thought Jesus was watching?
  Reply With Quote
Old 08-26-2005, 06:43 PM   #26
Jennifer
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Quote:
ChiefOfAss wrote
Wasn't it better when you thought Jesus was watching?
Um, no
  Reply With Quote
Old 08-27-2005, 04:51 PM   #27
Jennifer
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Quote:
St. Teabag wrote
Quote:
Jennifer wrote
Quote:
ChiefOfAss wrote
Wasn't it better when you thought Jesus was watching?
Um, no
he's talking about jesus watching a monkey spanking session, and perhaps taking a faceful of jizz (since he is everywhere)
I know. Exhibitionist for Christ would not be hot for me. I wouldn't really feel like he was into it.
  Reply With Quote
Old 08-28-2005, 01:04 PM   #28
ChiefOfAss
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Quote:
St. Teabag wrote
nah, he loves it. He's a right dirty bastard......
TOTALLY. I think that every night, Mary Mag was filled out like Chinese Fingercuffs and the 9 apostles who didn't have an oriface to occupy were watching while they waited in line.
  Reply With Quote
Old 08-28-2005, 01:50 PM   #29
Sternwallow
I Live Here
 
Sternwallow's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2005
Posts: 23,211
"First off, that's not urine. It's grape juice. What's funny is that the standards and practices people wouldn't let me use apple juice because I couldn't use something that actually looked like urine. So... anyway, I used grape juice."
- Adam Corolla

How about using real urine with a little food coloring so your artistic integrity is preserved?

"Those who most loudly proclaim their honesty are least likely to possess it."
"Atheism: rejecting all absurdity." S.H.
"Reality, the God alternative"
Sternwallow is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-29-2005, 12:20 PM   #30
ChiefOfAss
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Quote:
St. Teabag wrote
Adam corolla is a fucking retard. If he's allowed to talk such shit, I don't see how a little piss would hurt
Indeed.
That quote is from his new Comedy Central show. I thought it an ironic testimony to censorship in this country. Id always wondered why max-pad commercials used polite blue fluid instead of, say, menstrual chunks.

But that aside, he is a fucking retard.

You know, he actually had the nerve to try and riff on airplane food? His own audience was like, "dude... are you serious?"
  Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Forum Jump


All times are GMT -7. The time now is 02:36 AM.


Powered by: vBulletin - Copyright ©2000 - 2019, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Copyright © 2000 - , Raving Atheists [dot] com frequency-supranational frequency-supranational