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Old 04-01-2007, 02:09 PM   #1
Rhinoqulous
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Being that April is "Labor Safety Awareness Month" (at least up here it is, I'm not sure if this is nationally recognized yet), I'll share with you what I posted at work on Friday. I'll be pushing for my workplace to ban dihydrogen monoxide from the premises, and I encourage anyone that might be exposed to this potentially lethal chemical to do the same. The problem is, like with many chemicals we are exposed to everyday, no one really knows what to be watchful for (and this is especially relevant with the recant coming-to-light of 3M releasing potentially harmful chemicals into Southern Minnesota).

So what are some of the dangers associated with dihydrogen monoxide? Here's some info from the official Dihydrogen Monoxide Research Division:


Each year, Dihydrogen Monoxide is a known causative component in many thousands of deaths and is a major contributor to millions upon millions of dollars in damage to property and the environment. Some of the known perils of Dihydrogen Monoxide are:


* Death due to accidental inhalation of DHMO, even in small quantities.
* Prolonged exposure to solid DHMO causes severe tissue damage.
* Excessive ingestion produces a number of unpleasant though not typically life-threatening side-effects.
* DHMO is a major component of acid rain.
* Gaseous DHMO can cause severe burns.
* Contributes to soil erosion.
* Leads to corrosion and oxidation of many metals.
* Contamination of electrical systems often causes short-circuits.
* Exposure decreases effectiveness of automobile brakes.
* Found in biopsies of pre-cancerous tumors and lesions.
* Given to vicious dogs involved in recent deadly attacks.
* Often associated with killer cyclones in the U.S. Midwest and elsewhere, and in hurricanes including deadly storms in Florida, New Orleans and other areas of the southeastern U.S.
* Thermal variations in DHMO are a suspected contributor to the El Nino weather effect.


What are some uses of Dihydrogen Monoxide?
Despite the known dangers of DHMO, it continues to be used daily by industry, government, and even in private homes across the U.S. and worldwide. Some of the well-known uses of Dihydrogen Monoxide are:

* as an industrial solvent and coolant,
* in nuclear power plants,
* by the U.S. Navy in the propulsion systems of some older vessels,
* by elite athletes to improve performance,
* in the production of Styrofoam,
* in biological and chemical weapons manufacture,
* in the development of genetically engineering crops and animals,
* as a spray-on fire suppressant and retardant,
* in so-called "family planning" or "reproductive health" clinics,
* as a major ingredient in many home-brewed bombs,
* as a byproduct of hydrocarbon combustion in furnaces and air conditioning compressor operation,
* in cult rituals,
* by the Church of Scientology on their members and their members' families (although surprisingly, many members recently have contacted DHMO.org to vehemently deny such use),
* by both the KKK and the NAACP during rallies and marches,
* by members of Congress who are under investigation for financial corruption and inappropriate IM behavior,
* by the clientele at a number of bath houses in New York City and San Francisco,
* historically, in Hitler's death camps in Nazi Germany, and in prisons in Turkey, Serbia, Croatia, Libya, Iraq and Iran,
* in World War II prison camps in Japan, and in prisons in China, for various forms of torture,
* during many recent religious and ethnic wars in the Middle East,
* by many terrorist organizations including al Quaeda,
* in community swimming pools to maintain chemical balance,
* by software engineers, including those producing DICOM software SDKs,
* in animal research laboratories, and
* in pesticide production and distribution.


More information can be learned at dhmo.org.


I urge everyone to contact both their State and National representatives, and let them know you are concerned with this unnecessary exposure to dihydrogen monoxide. You can find your House Representative Here, and your Senate representative Here. I urge everyone to please take five minutes out of your day to email your members of Congress, and let them know the safety of the American worker should be the priority this April.

Wait just a minute-You expect me to believe-That all this misbehaving-Grew from one enchanted tree? And helpless to fight it-We should all be satisfied-With this magical explanation-For why the living die-And why it's hard to be a decent human being - David Bazan
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Old 04-01-2007, 02:16 PM   #2
Waddlie
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Hot dang! That dihydro wotsit looks like nasty stuff! How come I haven't heard of it before?

One man's strawman is another man's asshole.
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Old 04-01-2007, 02:18 PM   #3
Rhinoqulous
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Don't listen to Waddlie, he's obviously in on the international conspiracy of Dihydrogen Monoxide manufacturing.

Wait just a minute-You expect me to believe-That all this misbehaving-Grew from one enchanted tree? And helpless to fight it-We should all be satisfied-With this magical explanation-For why the living die-And why it's hard to be a decent human being - David Bazan
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Old 04-01-2007, 02:37 PM   #4
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I use DHMO in my experiments, so it's in my best interests to oppose a ban. I always wanted to be part of a vast conspiracy. :D
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Old 04-01-2007, 02:40 PM   #5
Rhinoqulous
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Quote:
Evil_Mage_Ra wrote
I use DHMO in my experiments, so it's in my best interests to oppose a ban. I always wanted to be part of a vast conspiracy. :D
I wish Waddlie hadn't blown my cover so soon. The petition I hung up at work had 27 sigs by the end of the day. Tomorrow I'll hang a sign explaining what DHMO really is. :P

Wait just a minute-You expect me to believe-That all this misbehaving-Grew from one enchanted tree? And helpless to fight it-We should all be satisfied-With this magical explanation-For why the living die-And why it's hard to be a decent human being - David Bazan
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Old 04-01-2007, 02:45 PM   #6
Waddlie
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Quote:
Rhinoqulous wrote
Quote:
Evil_Mage_Ra wrote
I use DHMO in my experiments, so it's in my best interests to oppose a ban. I always wanted to be part of a vast conspiracy. :D
I wish Waddlie hadn't blown my cover so soon. The petition I hung up at work had 27 sigs by the end of the day. Tomorrow I'll hang a sign explaining what DHMO really is. :P
I tried to unblow (suck?) it. Sorry.

One man's strawman is another man's asshole.
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Old 04-01-2007, 02:57 PM   #7
Rhinoqulous
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Quote:
Waddlie wrote
Quote:
Rhinoqulous wrote
Quote:
Evil_Mage_Ra wrote
I use DHMO in my experiments, so it's in my best interests to oppose a ban. I always wanted to be part of a vast conspiracy. :D
I wish Waddlie hadn't blown my cover so soon. The petition I hung up at work had 27 sigs by the end of the day. Tomorrow I'll hang a sign explaining what DHMO really is. :P
I tried to unblow (suck?) it. Sorry.
:lol::lol::lol:

No problem man, I'd be surprised if anyone here hasn't seen it yet. :P

Wait just a minute-You expect me to believe-That all this misbehaving-Grew from one enchanted tree? And helpless to fight it-We should all be satisfied-With this magical explanation-For why the living die-And why it's hard to be a decent human being - David Bazan
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Old 04-01-2007, 04:22 PM   #8
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I don't care for DHMO, myself, although I do use it every day.

I agree, it IS a dangerous substance, though.

Christian: One who believes that the New Testament is a divinely inspired book admirably suited to the spiritual needs of his neighbor. - Ambrose Bierce
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Old 04-01-2007, 05:05 PM   #9
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this was clever--i've seen it before though.
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Old 04-01-2007, 07:59 PM   #10
darwinfish
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I don't know what you people are talking about, I drink this shit every day...apparently it's good for your skin.
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Old 04-01-2007, 08:13 PM   #11
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Yeah, that's not 10 years old at all :P
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Old 04-01-2007, 08:43 PM   #12
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DHMO can be made safe(r) by the judicious addition of pharmaceutical grade ethyl hydroxide, CO2, and various grains and herbs partially digested by fungi.
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Old 04-01-2007, 08:46 PM   #13
Eva
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not fungi........yeasti......

One of the most irrational of all the conventions of modern society is the one to the effect that religious opinions should be respected....That they should have this immunity is an outrage. There is nothing in religious ideas, as a class, to lift them above other ideas. On the contrary, they are always dubious and often quite silly.
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Old 04-01-2007, 08:56 PM   #14
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yeasti are fungi
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Old 04-02-2007, 03:51 AM   #15
Rhinoqulous
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Quote:
snap crafter wrote
Yeah, that's not 10 years old at all :P
Closer to 20.

But it's still one of my favorite pranks.

Wait just a minute-You expect me to believe-That all this misbehaving-Grew from one enchanted tree? And helpless to fight it-We should all be satisfied-With this magical explanation-For why the living die-And why it's hard to be a decent human being - David Bazan
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