06-20-2010, 12:53 PM
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#1
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Mistress Monster Mod'rator Spy
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: The North Coast
Posts: 15,428
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Merry Olde Englandia
I landed in England on Friday morning, was met by the Smelly Old Git, and promptly whisked off to a day of terror on the "motorway", where I discovered why these fuckers drink so much. They drive on the wrong side of the road.
We drove for a bit, then Sheep!! stopped at a "motorway service area" for a bite and some coffee. Smelly showed me some real English meat.
We stayed the first night in Inverary, where Sheep!!the sun didn't set. Weird. I packed my fudge and off we went.
Smelly doesn't know what heelan kooze are for, eating or milking, so now that we have teh interwebs, we'll Sheep!! have to look. We drove through Glen Coe and I got a sunburn taking some piccies. We drove by signs for Cock Her Mouth, but I didn't want to go there.
We stopped in a converted insane asylum called Lyzzie Hall, near some Demented Water village. We took a Sheep!!stroll to Friar's Crack, where Smelly asked me if I fancied a paddle, and then I saw the biggest piece of living wood ever.
"I do not intend to tiptoe through life only to arrive safely at death."
Some drink at the fountain of knowledge. Others just gargle.
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06-20-2010, 01:00 PM
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#2
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Mistress Monster Mod'rator Spy
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: The North Coast
Posts: 15,428
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Today I saw the dry stacked walls turn into limestone walls. With Sheep!! lots of dead rabbits in the road. A little lamb was going to jump us, but Smelly hit the petrol and the lamb backed down. Fucker.
We saw a parade of old bastards blowing their horns.
Sheep!!
Tonight Smelly took me to a rather nice idyllic spot, took me to new heights. I could scarcely catch my breath!
Then I fingered a cow, and now we're Sheep!! having some nice tasty beverages. I ate Peter Rabbit and sampled Smelly's mushy peas.
"I do not intend to tiptoe through life only to arrive safely at death."
Some drink at the fountain of knowledge. Others just gargle.
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06-20-2010, 01:15 PM
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#3
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I Live Here
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Los Angeles, CA
Posts: 20,925
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Quote:
Kate wrote
Smelly showed me some real English meat...Smelly asked me if I fancied a paddle, and then I saw the biggest piece of living wood ever.
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The bastard! I've been trying to make him give it up for years!
The Leprechauns do not forbid the drawing of Their images, as long as we color within the lines. ~ Ghoulslime H Christ, Prophet, Seer, Revelator, and Masturbator
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06-20-2010, 01:16 PM
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#4
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I Live Here
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Los Angeles, CA
Posts: 20,925
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Quote:
Kate wrote
We drove through Glen Coe and I got a sunburn taking some piccies.
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Silly girl! When you take a piccie in direct sunlight, you need to shade your business.
The Leprechauns do not forbid the drawing of Their images, as long as we color within the lines. ~ Ghoulslime H Christ, Prophet, Seer, Revelator, and Masturbator
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06-20-2010, 01:17 PM
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#5
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I Live Here
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Los Angeles, CA
Posts: 20,925
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Quote:
Kate wrote
Today I saw the dry stacked walls turn into limestone walls. With Sheep!! lots of dead rabbits in the road. A little lamb was going to jump us, but Smelly hit the petrol and the lamb backed down. Fucker.
We saw a parade of old bastards blowing their horns.
Sheep!!
Tonight Smelly took me to a rather nice idyllic spot, took me to new heights. I could scarcely catch my breath!
Then I fingered a cow, and now we're Sheep!! having some nice tasty beverages. I ate Peter Rabbit and sampled Smelly's mushy peas.
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The Leprechauns do not forbid the drawing of Their images, as long as we color within the lines. ~ Ghoulslime H Christ, Prophet, Seer, Revelator, and Masturbator
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06-20-2010, 06:38 PM
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#6
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Super Moderator
Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: Puerto Rico
Posts: 9,775
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kate, smelly is MINE. keep your filthy hands to yerself.
One of the most irrational of all the conventions of modern society is the one to the effect that religious opinions should be respected....That they should have this immunity is an outrage. There is nothing in religious ideas, as a class, to lift them above other ideas. On the contrary, they are always dubious and often quite silly.
H. L. Mencken
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06-21-2010, 12:28 AM
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#7
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Mistress Monster Mod'rator Spy
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: The North Coast
Posts: 15,428
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I saw him first, beeyatch.
And for your information, they have running water and soap over here. My hands are quite clean.
"I do not intend to tiptoe through life only to arrive safely at death."
Some drink at the fountain of knowledge. Others just gargle.
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06-21-2010, 05:42 AM
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#8
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Organ Donator
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: Beastly Muck
Posts: 13,136
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Quote:
Kate wrote
I discovered why these fuckers drink so much. They drive on the wrong side of the road.
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I thought it was the other way around...
(But then again I also thought "roundabouts" went the other way around.)
[In Australia they do, just like the bathtub drains.]
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
La propriété, c'est le vol ...
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06-21-2010, 12:11 PM
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#9
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I Live Here
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: UK
Posts: 9,613
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have you hit the Cotswolds yet? quite a few Llamas there as well as sheep - not one of who wears a silly hat- well not while I was looking at them anyways
heelan coos are for looking at- not for eating or milking- they are for tourists such as yourself
“'I am offended by that.' Well, so fucking what." Fry
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06-21-2010, 03:05 PM
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#10
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I Live Here
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Los Angeles, CA
Posts: 20,925
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Quote:
Eva wrote
kate, smelly is MINE. keep your filthy hands to yerself.
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For the record, I don't her filthy hands. Feel free to let them roam unhindered.
The Leprechauns do not forbid the drawing of Their images, as long as we color within the lines. ~ Ghoulslime H Christ, Prophet, Seer, Revelator, and Masturbator
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06-21-2010, 03:06 PM
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#11
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I Live Here
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Los Angeles, CA
Posts: 20,925
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Quote:
psychodiva wrote
have you hit the Cotswolds yet? quite a few Llamas there as well as sheep - not one of who wears a silly hat- well not while I was looking at them anyways
heelan coos are for looking at- not for eating or milking- they are for tourists such as yourself
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Are heelan coos self-righteous and condescending cows?
The Leprechauns do not forbid the drawing of Their images, as long as we color within the lines. ~ Ghoulslime H Christ, Prophet, Seer, Revelator, and Masturbator
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06-21-2010, 03:35 PM
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#12
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Senior Member
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: Scotland
Posts: 813
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Ahhhh, the coos, many a cold winter night in need of companionship and warmth. With her soft lilting voice carried across the glen stirring the blood. Kilt proudly tenting. Like two ships passing in the n...........
Sorry, was I saying that out loud ?
Professor Plum - In the Dinning Room - with the Lead Pipe...
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06-21-2010, 04:13 PM
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#13
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I Live Here
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Los Angeles, CA
Posts: 20,925
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Quote:
Sol wrote
Ahhhh, the coos, many a cold winter night in need of companionship and warmth. With her soft lilting voice carried across the glen stirring the blood. Kilt proudly tenting. Like two ships passing in the n...........
Sorry, was I saying that out loud ?
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Do go on! It's nice to start one's morning with the vivid graphic depiction of a great hairy Scotsman with a boner.
The Leprechauns do not forbid the drawing of Their images, as long as we color within the lines. ~ Ghoulslime H Christ, Prophet, Seer, Revelator, and Masturbator
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06-21-2010, 08:23 PM
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#14
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still unsmited
Join Date: Sep 2005
Posts: 4,661
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Quote:
ghoulslime wrote
Do go on! It's nice to start one's morning with the vivid graphic depiction of a great hairy Scotsman with a boner.
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That's how every day starts in Gnosiland.
Katers, did you bring your wellies? I hear sheep like em a lot.
I can't wait to hear the meat stories when you get back!!
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06-22-2010, 11:26 AM
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#15
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Stinkin' Mod
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Britland
Posts: 13,616
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Saw this, turned my back for two minutes - Kate had vanished!
Stop the Holy See men!
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