Old 12-22-2017, 11:58 AM   #1
ghoulslime
I Live Here
 
ghoulslime's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Los Angeles, CA
Posts: 20,925
Raving Atheists Christmas 2017



Christmas time is upon us once more. Christmas is a time for reflection on the miracle which is our own existence. It is a time for introspection, a frosted window of opportunity to peer into the twinkling Christmas lights of our memories. We may find the warmth of nostalgia beside the firesides of our hearts, or we may discover a frozen winter there, and a need to kindle the Yule log of our passions once more. It is time for us to confront the ghosts of Christmas past.



Cast off those chains you have forged throughout the year! Rise up, you jolly elves! Lift up your voices with me, and let us sing the tidings of great joy! What Christmas glories we have witnessed! What tender Christmas memories brighten our winter eves!



Set sail we, across the seas of eternal darkness! Riding upon the waves of cosmic light! Lead onward, oh, Captain Santa! Hell may resist our Christmas cheer, but festooned will be the bodies of the Christmas casualties, with glorious LED bulbs from China. Ride, Captain, ride upon your Christmas Ship!



Avast, ye scurvy scalawags! One Reply to "Strike yer Christmas colors, ye bloomin' cockroachers!" Santa will have your lily liver on his candy cane before the Christmas mouse feeds on plum cake crumbs. Santa will shove presents up yer bums, until ye succumbs to the joy of the season. This is the reason for the season! Oh, come all ye faithful! Let's us discover the glory holes of Christmas together!


The Leprechauns do not forbid the drawing of Their images, as long as we color within the lines. ~ Ghoulslime H Christ, Prophet, Seer, Revelator, and Masturbator
ghoulslime is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 12-22-2017, 12:01 PM   #2
ghoulslime
I Live Here
 
ghoulslime's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Los Angeles, CA
Posts: 20,925
Ghosts of Raving Atheist Christmas Past

So, has it really been three years since last we celebrated a Raving Atheist Christmas? Father Time has slipped a couple of sneaky ones in the back door, right down the chimney, without us feeling Christmas go in or come out!

The Ghosts of Christmas Past




Raving Atheists Christmas Thread 2014

Raving Atheists Christmas Thread 2012

Raving Atheists Christmas Thread 2011

Raving Atheists Christmas Thread 2010

Raving Atheists Christmas Thread 2009

Merry Xmas Picture Thread 2008

Ghoulslime's Letters from Santa Thread 2005-2008

Should I teach my kids to believe in Santa Thread



The Leprechauns do not forbid the drawing of Their images, as long as we color within the lines. ~ Ghoulslime H Christ, Prophet, Seer, Revelator, and Masturbator
ghoulslime is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 12-22-2017, 12:27 PM   #3
ghoulslime
I Live Here
 
ghoulslime's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Los Angeles, CA
Posts: 20,925
Rudolph and the Rabbits

Itís beginning to look a lot like Christmas, at our house. The other night, Sweetie Pie and Sugarcane came into the food giant's house, and watched Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer.



Itís a very nice Christmas movie, about a flying reindeer that has a red nose. I am not sure if it is a true story. I'm pretty sure the Bible says something about it.



It has a scary monster, that becomes a nice Christmas monster later. Bumble reminds me a lot of the god of the Old Testament who becomes a nice god, later, in the New Testament. I wonder if Bumble could really be God.



It has a happy ending, because Rudolph gets to help Santa deliver presents for Christmas. Have a holly, jolly Christmas!



Then Sugarcane and Sweetie Pie were nestled back in their beds, in their happy bunny house, with visions of sugarplums dancing in their heads. Good night, bunnies! Merry Christmas!


The Leprechauns do not forbid the drawing of Their images, as long as we color within the lines. ~ Ghoulslime H Christ, Prophet, Seer, Revelator, and Masturbator
ghoulslime is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 12-22-2017, 12:32 PM   #4
ghoulslime
I Live Here
 
ghoulslime's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Los Angeles, CA
Posts: 20,925
Christmas is the time for getting!


The Leprechauns do not forbid the drawing of Their images, as long as we color within the lines. ~ Ghoulslime H Christ, Prophet, Seer, Revelator, and Masturbator
ghoulslime is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 12-22-2017, 12:43 PM   #5
Smellyoldgit
Stinkin' Mod
 
Smellyoldgit's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Britland
Posts: 13,581
Fuck Christmas & the crock of shit it rode in on!


Stop the Holy See men!
Smellyoldgit is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 12-22-2017, 01:18 PM   #6
Smellyoldgit
Stinkin' Mod
 
Smellyoldgit's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Britland
Posts: 13,581
Christmas can kiss my fucking hairy ballsack. I have no interest to partake in the annual fucked up festival of greed, hypocricy, overspending and general bad taste. The legions of already fat fuckers will go about cramming their bloated pie-holes with the regulation grease, junk, booze & stodgy sweet shite.

A fortune will be spent on boatloads of chinese-made crap that nobody wants - Hallmark will shift shitloads of fucking retarded cards that never see a recycling bin, and why the fuck anybody wants to stuff a tree in the house & cover it in balls is beyond me. Thankfully, I don't own a tele so it's easy to avoid the flood of seasonal shite, repeats, Jesusy wank and the fucking queen's bullshit speech. And don't start me on the fucking months of torture that masquerades as music!

The whole fuck-fest is nothing more than a huge con, aimed at getting the gormless fuckheads of the population to spend spend and spend again till the next commercial shit wagon comes around. I fucking hate it and can't wait for some semblance of normality to return. Bollocks to it all!

Stop the Holy See men!
Smellyoldgit is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 12-22-2017, 01:26 PM   #7
Smellyoldgit
Stinkin' Mod
 
Smellyoldgit's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Britland
Posts: 13,581

Stop the Holy See men!
Smellyoldgit is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 12-22-2017, 01:52 PM   #8
dogpet
Obsessed Member
 
dogpet's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: The Mongrel Nation
Posts: 4,834
What idiot decided the end of December was a good time to be forced to use up some of our precious holiday allowance? We could have a wonderful christmas break in June or July instead, & people wouldn't have to waste so much electricity on decorations either. The Australians have the right idea. Xmas according to season is the call!

Roll on easter .

thank goodness he's on our side
dogpet is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 12-22-2017, 01:55 PM   #9
Smellyoldgit
Stinkin' Mod
 
Smellyoldgit's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Britland
Posts: 13,581
Quote:
dogpet wrote View Post
Roll on easter .
I prefer Valentine's Day - at least there's the increased possibility of a shag ....

Stop the Holy See men!
Smellyoldgit is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 12-22-2017, 02:40 PM   #10
ghoulslime
I Live Here
 
ghoulslime's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Los Angeles, CA
Posts: 20,925
Quote:
Smellyoldgit wrote View Post
Christmas can kiss my fucking hairy ballsack. I have no interest to partake in the annual fucked up festival of greed, hypocricy, overspending and general bad taste. The legions of already fat fuckers will go about cramming their bloated pie-holes with the regulation grease, junk, booze & stodgy sweet shite.

A fortune will be spent on boatloads of chinese-made crap that nobody wants - Hallmark will shift shitloads of fucking retarded cards that never see a recycling bin, and why the fuck anybody wants to stuff a tree in the house & cover it in balls is beyond me. Thankfully, I don't own a tele so it's easy to avoid the flood of seasonal shite, repeats, Jesusy wank and the fucking queen's bullshit speech. And don't start me on the fucking months of torture that masquerades as music!

The whole fuck-fest is nothing more than a huge con, aimed at getting the gormless fuckheads of the population to spend spend and spend again till the next commercial shit wagon comes around. I fucking hate it and can't wait for some semblance of normality to return. Bollocks to it all!

Well, now! It looks like somebody needs to put Mr. Hanky in his mouth, and try to say, "Ho, ho, ho and yum, yum, yum! Christmas time has come!"




Put something sweet in your mouth. Hang up some shiny shit! Get up off your grinchy ass, and fucking celebrate!


The Leprechauns do not forbid the drawing of Their images, as long as we color within the lines. ~ Ghoulslime H Christ, Prophet, Seer, Revelator, and Masturbator
ghoulslime is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 12-22-2017, 02:41 PM   #11
ghoulslime
I Live Here
 
ghoulslime's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Los Angeles, CA
Posts: 20,925
Quote:
Smellyoldgit wrote View Post
I prefer Valentine's Day - at least there's the increased possibility of a shag ....
You've obviously been sitting on the laps of the wrong Santas.

The Leprechauns do not forbid the drawing of Their images, as long as we color within the lines. ~ Ghoulslime H Christ, Prophet, Seer, Revelator, and Masturbator
ghoulslime is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 12-22-2017, 02:47 PM   #12
ghoulslime
I Live Here
 
ghoulslime's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Los Angeles, CA
Posts: 20,925
Quote:
dogpet wrote View Post
What idiot decided the end of December was a good time to be forced to use up some of our precious holiday allowance? We could have a wonderful christmas break in June or July instead, & people wouldn't have to waste so much electricity on decorations either. The Australians have the right idea. Xmas according to season is the call!

Roll on easter .

In winter, it gets dark in the north, really fucking dark. In the morning, it is dark. In the evening, it is ding dong merrily on high, really goddamn dark. Always fucking dark!

Hanging up shiny stuff, and telling everybody that they are full of joy, and that it is the most wonderful time of the year, was a really clever idea.


It beats sitting here, drinking whiskey in the dark, until we all hang ourselves from the pine trees.


The Merriest of Christmases to you!



The Leprechauns do not forbid the drawing of Their images, as long as we color within the lines. ~ Ghoulslime H Christ, Prophet, Seer, Revelator, and Masturbator
ghoulslime is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 12-22-2017, 02:51 PM   #13
ghoulslime
I Live Here
 
ghoulslime's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Los Angeles, CA
Posts: 20,925


ďAnd it was always said of him, that he knew how to keep Christmas well, if any man alive possessed the knowledge. May that be truly said of us, and all of us! And so, as Tiny Tim observed, God bless Us, Every One!Ē

― Charles Dickens, A Christmas Carol

The Leprechauns do not forbid the drawing of Their images, as long as we color within the lines. ~ Ghoulslime H Christ, Prophet, Seer, Revelator, and Masturbator
ghoulslime is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 12-22-2017, 03:03 PM   #14
dogpet
Obsessed Member
 
dogpet's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: The Mongrel Nation
Posts: 4,834
Quote:
ghoulslime wrote View Post


Hanging up shiny stuff, and telling everybody that they are full of joy, and that it is the most wonderful time of the year, was a really clever idea.
The annual guilt trip is worth enforcing I suppose, even just as a reminder of what your family's like. Yes we love you!

Quote:
The Merriest of Christmases to you!

All the best to you & your rabbits ghoul, hope they get plenty of cud to chew.

thank goodness he's on our side
dogpet is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 12-22-2017, 03:40 PM   #15
dogpet
Obsessed Member
 
dogpet's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: The Mongrel Nation
Posts: 4,834
In many cases it is an enforced holiday. Where are all the no religious interference crowd?

thank goodness he's on our side
dogpet is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Forum Jump


All times are GMT -7. The time now is 10:09 AM.


Powered by: vBulletin - Copyright ©2000 - 2020, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Copyright © 2000 - , Raving Atheists [dot] com frequency-supranational frequency-supranational